February 9, 2022

We grow old. We grow feeble and fragile and pretty much worthless. That’s the narrative in our culture. And it’s not often I find a different story. Enter James Hillman.

A psychologist and author of more than twenty books, he offers a very different and life affirming perspective. There is such purpose and hope in his writing that I recommend reading the entire excerpt from one of his books that is featured in the current issue of The Sun Magazine. The Sun has currently taken down its pay wall and you can access the whole issue on line. 

So let’s talk about brain fade. I wish I had this perspective as my mom and dad slipped into what we call dementia. Yes, as we age we do lose some brain function. But apparently there are other parts of our brain that actually grow and mature. Specifically certain cortical neurons seem actually to become more abundant with our maturity. Neuroscientists suggest this might be the source of wisdom. It’s not a loss of brain function, it’s a shift in brain function. We prioritize long term memory over short term. We may forget names or where we put our keys, but we remember more clearly and vividly our memories. Hillman writes that this is not work from the past but of the past. If past time is not to be lost time, one must give it presence.

And so we wander down memory lane more often. We are giving presence to those experiences, we are commemorating them. The memory of these moments in our soul history keeps them alive, keeps our intrinsic character alive, keeps our values alive.

Wonderful. So what’s the point? 

The point is getting ready for our final transition. The point is clearing away what burdens us and celebrating those moments that are soul full, moments when our souls shone a bright light. What’s remarkable to me is that Hillman actually names this the work of soul, the soul letting go of the weights it has been carrying, preparing to lift off more easily. 

We wander the landscape of our memories and where we left our keys is just not important. We are not gone from this world, we are just spending more time in a world of our character, our essential essence. The work of soul in transition. 

People around us may wring their hands and try to coax and cajole us back to this world of mundane detail. They simply don’t understand the work we are about. We are not lost to this world, not yet. We are simply focused on the landscape of our soul, the work of soul. Some of the most important work we will do in this life…in this life for the next life. 

I so wish I had this knowing for my parents. I would have been more understanding and compassionate. Perhaps I would have spent less time in fear of losing them. They were wandering, but they were not lost. Perhaps I would have spent less time admonishing them for forgetting names and faces and where they left their glasses. Perhaps I would have found ways to support them in their work of soul. 

When I begin to wander, I pray that someone understands that I’m not lost, that they hold a space of compassion and understanding that I’m just doing the work of soul.

Blessings of Crone Wisdom,
Judith